In other news...I still can't stand Brokencyde, J starr (sp?), Millionaires, 3O3, or most other shit that came into action past 2002. Gallows is the exception to this. I just cant have dance parties. I have "mosh your face" parties.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Passed out at work
Why is it that everyone is supposed to go to high school ,then college, then get a grown up job...yet it is fucking impossible to find money when you DO want to go to school? Yesterday I went to my financial aid advisor to find out that I can only attend class part time and pay 110$ out of pocket a month. so heres how my monthly bills will round out....
655-rent
110-school
50-cell
30(?)-comed
3145994820-art supplies.
Shit is expensive. So today while at work I started rambling off....everything. I started talking really fast like I do when I'm back home. Then, even faster. Then I started to get shortened breath. Then, fell down. I came to and people gave me water and sent me home. Apparently trying to better yourself isn't fucking easy. I know so many people that take college for granted. "Oh, my mom is making me go."
Well chances are your mom is also paying for your shit so stop fucking whining. How bout your dad co-signs for me so I can go to school and not have to worry about if it will make my ass homeless.
I just dont fucking get it. But I'm also sick of these stupid fucking jobs that I dread going to every day. This is the only way out I guess.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Glad I stumbled across this.
Internet lurking can sometimes make you feel better. This is an excerpt from an interview done with Alex Pardee from Juxtapoz Magazine. He's a fucking amazing artist and you have probably seen his stuff with Hurley or The Used.
"It’s no secret that Alex has suffered from “severe emotional and psychological issues,” and was placed on strong antipsychotic medication at the tender age of 14 to help combat his ‘sickness’ (which we’re more apt to label an intense outpouring of creativity, but hell we’re not doctors.) Alex was even placed in a mental hospital for a period of time as a teen, where he “felt completely out of place.”
As we talk about the difference between illness and intelligence, and it’s hard not to be struck by the artist’s obvious humble acceptance of his adolescence and the coinciding challenges that many others would probably have allowed to consume them with anger, fear, insecurity, and confusion. We’re not saying the average individual doesn’t go through bouts of these emotions; however, Alex has been able to parlay his unique past into a sort of therapy, allowing his artwork and projects to serve as a cathartic release. “I’m happy most of the time now,” he says. “I still get upset about stuff, but I think that’s normal. Healthy people aren’t happy all the time. I’ve been doing this for so long, I don’t know what I’d be like if I wasn’t painting and working so much. It’s just what I do.”
Looking at his newest works, it’s plain to see that Alex’s passion has taken yet another turn towards greatness. More thematically unified than previous shows, Letters From Digested Children will offer viewers an invitation into a complete world created by the artist. “I always loved Disneyland because it was like an entire experience from start to finish. Like, Space Mountain didn’t just begin when you got on the ride, it began when you got in line.” Similarly, Alex has an entire artistic ride planned for the top level of FIFTY24SF Gallery (complete with monster cookies…yum.) Strap on those artsy seatbelts, kids."
"It’s no secret that Alex has suffered from “severe emotional and psychological issues,” and was placed on strong antipsychotic medication at the tender age of 14 to help combat his ‘sickness’ (which we’re more apt to label an intense outpouring of creativity, but hell we’re not doctors.) Alex was even placed in a mental hospital for a period of time as a teen, where he “felt completely out of place.”
As we talk about the difference between illness and intelligence, and it’s hard not to be struck by the artist’s obvious humble acceptance of his adolescence and the coinciding challenges that many others would probably have allowed to consume them with anger, fear, insecurity, and confusion. We’re not saying the average individual doesn’t go through bouts of these emotions; however, Alex has been able to parlay his unique past into a sort of therapy, allowing his artwork and projects to serve as a cathartic release. “I’m happy most of the time now,” he says. “I still get upset about stuff, but I think that’s normal. Healthy people aren’t happy all the time. I’ve been doing this for so long, I don’t know what I’d be like if I wasn’t painting and working so much. It’s just what I do.”
Looking at his newest works, it’s plain to see that Alex’s passion has taken yet another turn towards greatness. More thematically unified than previous shows, Letters From Digested Children will offer viewers an invitation into a complete world created by the artist. “I always loved Disneyland because it was like an entire experience from start to finish. Like, Space Mountain didn’t just begin when you got on the ride, it began when you got in line.” Similarly, Alex has an entire artistic ride planned for the top level of FIFTY24SF Gallery (complete with monster cookies…yum.) Strap on those artsy seatbelts, kids."
At the very least it makes mee feel like this desolation and heartbreak isn't for nothing. Maybe I can get a few good pieces out of it.
Thursday, January 1, 2009
True Romance is Dead, I shot it in the chest and in the head.
To a certain degree, every single person believes that everything happens for a reason. Granted, people have different names for it. Sometimes it's God. Sometimes it's Fate. But no one believes that you just kind of float along hoping things happen.
Personally, I know everything happens for a reason. But only to a point. If you sit on the bus and a cute girl/guy sits next to you, it's up to you to find a way to talk to them. If your band finally gets booked to play the Metro, it's up to you to promote the fuck out of your show so more people come. When you get those school scholarships it's up to you to decide WHICH school to go to.
Fate can introduce you to the girl of your dreams. The only girl you can ever connect with. Or be truly honest with. You can become best friends. Tell each other things you would never tell another soul and not have to follow up with "So help me if you ever tell anyone this I will be forces to kill you." You can have the greatest times of your life doing the simplest things like lying down late at night waiting for Chicago Pizza to show up. Nightmares will fade. The only nightmares you have thereafter are of her getting hurt, and those are far worse than the nightmares of yourself being set on fire. You save everything and still keep it on a shelf on your bookcase.
But fate can only get you so far. Fate can't put you together. Everything happens for a reason up to a certain point. What if you lost your chance? What if fate isn't forgiving? That could be the only girl you ever tell those secrets to. It could be the only girl you ever want to share a bed with.
If fate isn't forgiving, will you be alone the rest of your life?
Will I always be as alone as I am now?
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Awesome toys I want.
Seriously people, get on it...
Actually...I should stop looking. I just keep wanting more of them. Its like crack I swear. All toys here and in my xmas list and more. 20 inch kozik dunny? seriously? i dont care...I want.
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